The Blargh!!

Bellingham, Washington

Brooke — Sat, 29 Mar 2008 00:12:00 +0000

Where even the snow is really just another type of rain.

Someone is WRONG on the Internet.

Brooke — Tue, 18 Mar 2008 01:26:00 +0000

Actually a lot of people. Specifically, today is not St. Patrick's Day. I knew this on Saturday (the actual St. Patrick's Day), but apparently no one else knows it even today. Even Google got it wrong, which I find amusing. Half the people I know only find out when it's a holiday because of the Google logo changes. Alright, maybe that's just me, half of the time.

I'm wearing green regardless (though not intentionally), but I don't have time to drink lots of green beer because of finals. Boo.

Mwrrrr

Brooke — Tue, 04 Mar 2008 20:43:00 +0000

I kind of miss the blogging I used to do. I was looking through archives today, and my life was a lot more interesting/fun before I started going to western. I write terribly, but there are a lot of memories in these archives. I used to be so candid and energetic. I wonder when that stopped. Or if I can potentially bring it back :o

I've been unhappy for a really long time, but I really need to quit being a big fat whiner :P There's got to be things I can talk about besides how much I hate school.

The other thing I got from browsing archives is this:

To all of you people in LA that I haven't seen in years, I miss you guys SOOOOO much. Much love.

Confession:

Brooke — Fri, 29 Feb 2008 05:39:00 +0000

I secretly really really hate almost all math puns. Some puns are okay with me, and even amuse me. Math puns are not among them.

School is not totally unbearable this quarter after all, I just need to stop getting owned by unix. I have like 3 days to get the next assignment done, and that might not be enough at the rate I work. I've decided my real problem is less procrastination and more inefficiency. When I am doing homework, I'm never 100% doing homework unless it's due VERY SOON YES MUST FINISH NOW. Usually I'd say I'm about 10% doing homework and 90% brain elsewhere. Like blogging.

I wish I knew how to make that number go up.

Sleep is amazing.

Brooke — Sun, 24 Feb 2008 17:23:00 +0000

I will never be a morning person, but lately I've been going to bed around 10 and waking up (gasp) before or around 8 am. It's really nice to wake up in the morning, but not to an annoying sound that repeats over and over until you want to smash it with a hammer. Breakfast is also Really Nice.

It also kind of helps me get stuff done during the day. Sort of.

sew on patches to all your tears

Hi guys, long time no see

Brooke — Wed, 13 Feb 2008 23:46:00 +0000

Things are much the same as always. I'm doing semi-badly in school, I'm vaguely angsty about living out my life as an old maid, and I still have no idea what I'm actually going to do with these degrees that I'm getting. I have little to no interest in web programming and little to no skill with programming in anything but scheme and C variants. As of yet, I also have little to no skill in circuit design and analysis. I'm hoping the next 2 years of electronics classes will change that.

School really, really blows. I want to just get married and say screw it all. Maybe I'll drop out of college and join knitting clubs and take cooking lessons. I just don't feel like I'm really suzie homemaker type either. Bleh.

I could get A's if I cared enough. If I do that though, I will have to entirely sacrifice my social life. I'm not talking about my "social life" as in my free time to game, though I would have to sacrifice that too. I'm talking about hanging out with people and going places on the weekends and having fun. Someone tell me what to do.

Life is pain, Highness.

Brooke — Thu, 25 Oct 2007 06:41:00 +0000

Anyone who says differently is selling something.

I'm doing enough coding this quarter that I figure I might actually be learning something. However, I've come to believe that sleep is a myth propagated by those irrationally idealistic hipster liberals. They're out to get me, but I have thwarted them with caffeine and techno.

More seriously, I know that I'm kind of putting my body and mind through the ringer here by repeatedly staying up through the night to finish things, but sometimes it has to be done. This is the first quarter I've ever had to do it so much so early, is all.

I just want to curl up and sleep for a week, but I also want to pass my classes, and these two desires are incompatible. :(

Apples!

Brooke — Mon, 17 Sep 2007 06:23:00 +0000

My sister and I have acquired a couple boxes of apples. Who wants to have an applesauce/apple pie making party?! They are delicious apples. I will let you have some if you are nice to me.

School starts in a little over a week. My job has been pretty learnsome, but sometimes it's a long day of boring installations or stuff like that. It's a pretty nice relaxing job for the summer though. Nice to have a little something to do so I don't feel like a total bum, but 20 hours a week gives me plenty of time to have fun as well.

My month-long summer has been fun enough to almost make up for the fact that I only get a month. Lots of floating in boats, and enjoying the sunlight. Enough books to fill in any space when I don't feel like playing wow or enjoying the sunlight. It's a good life. My bedroom and livingroom are far beyond messy right now, but I'm not too terribly worried about that. My oldest sister and my brother-in-law are coming out to help us find furniture next weekend, so it'll have to be cleaned up by then. Visitors are great motivation for cleaning up.

Don't forget to tell me if you want apples, or apple pie, or applesauce.

Hobbies?

Brooke — Fri, 07 Sep 2007 19:53:00 +0000

Lately I've been plagued by what I like to call artistic itchiness. It's like when your imagination starts running and you're like "I'm sure I could make a story out of that." Or when you see something gorgeous and you can just picture some impossible addition to it, and you wish you had the talent to draw it.

This feeling has almost always been there for me, whether it's writing, drawing, digital art, music, whatever. I always have the feeling that if I actually put effort into it, I could be really good at those things. However, since I haven't, I know that all I would do if I tried is add to the mounds and mounds of crap that people put out there in the name of "art." The result, then, is artistic itchiness. The desire to do something, but the unwillingness to subject people to something terrible. It takes time and effort to get to the point where it's no longer something terrible, and I have too much other stuff that I want to put time and effort into.

So I will instead simply whine about it. Or maybe get a s00per s3cre7 sketchpad and hide it under my bed. Probably both.

I'm so smart

Brooke — Fri, 31 Aug 2007 04:35:00 +0000

(2007-08-30 21:34:41) wootsicles: I -will- get one
(2007-08-30 21:34:45) wootsicles: if I have to sell my left boob
(2007-08-30 21:34:53) brookiibeast: sell the right one instead
(2007-08-30 21:34:57) brookiibeast: that way you can practice archery
(2007-08-30 21:35:05) wootsicles: :D

Almost done

Brooke — Thu, 23 Aug 2007 08:26:00 +0000

Two more finals, and then done for the quarter.

Also, I got a job. I start Friday. I get to make the computer labs better. Hopefully I will be helpful and things will actually improve.

Cat in lap = happy.

Must study for Operating Systems. Blargh.

Also, I want a trash can.

I am terrible at keeping in touch

Brooke — Mon, 20 Aug 2007 11:36:00 +0000

I really wish I were better at being awesome. I vaguely remember a time when I actually kept in contact with all my friends on an extremely regular basis, and kept myself updated via blogs, etc. I stopped checking blogs on a regular basis at least a year ago I think, which is sad. The problem is that there simply got to be too many. I tried using various tracking mechanisms, but the fact of the matter is that it takes too long. Now when I do remember to check them, I read all the crazy things that have been happening to people and feel sad that I didn't already know about them.

Generally I feel like crap about myself lately, because I suck at helping people, and I suck even more at doing things when they need doing, and I complain a lot, and people like me anyway and I think they shouldn't, but that just makes me sound all self-pitying and self-deprecating, both of which I am, both of which are sucky things to be.

Thusly I feel like moping, but I don't have time to mope because I have a file system API due a day and a half from now, 5 geology labs to finish by wednesday, and finals on wednesday, thursday, and friday. People are coming to visit me thursday through monday-ish and my apartment is a wreck. Completely out of money with which to pay rent, when the time comes. Mom's going in for surgery again on the 31st, which should go without a hitch, and makes it so she doesn't have to do chemo between now and then (a nice thing, chemo sucks). This is certainly not a bad thing, but it is yet another thing on my mind this week.

I swear, some day I will make a blog post about something happy.

OOh! I have something happy. Geofrey Sanders is now happily married off, and I got to go to his wedding in Chubbuck, Idaho. It was very pretty, and they were very happy, and I quite liked the service. The trip as a whole was pretty tiring (two 12-hour drives in something like 36 hours can do that), but very fun. Went with Sharon, Cameron, and McHarg, and there were good times. My favorite moment -

"are you by any chance couples?" - photographer
"no." - all four of us simultaneously
"well, that was very definitive."

I lol'd. And now I have managed to waste nearly half an hour blogging instead of coding. Go me.

Terminal

Brooke — Fri, 29 Jun 2007 17:05:00 +0000

Free public wifi should be a right. It should be crappy and slow so that people will still pay for well-maintained and speedy internets, but there should be free wifi in public places. Like airports.

I ordered replacement parts for my broken down computer. Basically I bought a new computer. It will be fast and shiny. When I get more money I'll buy new drives and then it will pretty much be entirely new. 2^64 is 16 million Tb, which apparently means I need faster hard drives.

I have 3 classes with 3 male teachers, 2 of whom have nifty accents (australian and british). The third is my geology prof, who is so ridiculously excited about geology and teaching that it's just amusing to watch. Kind of like visiting a house that has a really excited, really big dog, who is jumping all over someone else. It looks to be a very entertaining quarter.

Hey guys, long time no see

Brooke — Sun, 24 Jun 2007 02:56:00 +0000

I've been "busy" lately, which I'm ashamed to say just means I've been playing WoW. There's a reason I avoided it for years, and that is that I knew what would happen if I started playing. On the other hand, it's a game I quite simply enjoy a lot, and there's a limit to how bad I can feel about taking my spare time and using it to do something I enjoy a lot.

My desktop computer died (please take this moment of silence for the Yak) and I think I might possibly have enough money to put together a new one. It would even be better, faster, stronger.

Brittainy is coming to live with me in September. I'm going to california in a week, and I'm dying my hair black tomorrow so that I can properly cosplay. Which I'd like to point out is not actually cosplaying at all because I'm not doing any rping. It's not cosplaying any more than putting on a halloween costume is. You're all jerks and I hate (love) you.

I don't think it's possible for me to destress anymore. I've decided that stress is just how life will work for me until I'm out of college at the very least. Then I'll have different and possibly more profitable things to be stressed about.

Enjoy your RealUpdate™, perhaps there will be more.

Yeah....

Brooke — Wed, 04 Apr 2007 21:52:00 +0000

I want to go back to LA.

I'm dying.

Brooke — Sat, 17 Mar 2007 20:10:00 +0000

Dying, I say. Tuesday night I got 2 hours of sleep. Took a 2 hour nap later on wednesday. Then I didn't sleep at all Wednesday or Thursday night. Thursday at 12 I fell, asleep, but then woke up at 2 because my body told me I was dying. It was right.

So yesterday I was incapacitated for the remainder of the day, yet only able to sleep for little spurts. I finally got to real sleep at about 11, and when I got up today I felt much better.

Moral of the story... don't try to run on almost no sleep for 72 hours, your body gets HELLA PISSED.

On the other hand - I got enough done on my game that I will probably get a decent enough grade. Depending on how much most people got done, probably. I talked to my EET prof and he's letting me turn in my late work on the day of the final.

But if I get that in, and I do well on the finals, I'll actually bring my GPA up this quarter. YAY.

Mongolian Fire Oil!!

Brooke — Tue, 06 Mar 2007 00:29:00 +0000

Sharon's blog is now cute and pretty, and I'm jealous. If I had the time, I would totally be playing with CSS right now.

Instead I'm working on my "rogue-like game" for C++. I feel so behind on everything. I think I can actually get something done now though.

I want free health care! Maybe I should move to Canadia.

Yay for taxes coming back. Boo for finals. Yay for break.

bery tired.

Brooke — Wed, 28 Feb 2007 10:37:00 +0000

I think my cat is making my hands swell by sitting on my forearms while I type. I'm not entirely sure the two things are actually related, but it seems somewhat plausible. My hands feel dry and itchy and puffy, and my cat is somewhat inhibiting the flow of blood to the area. Darn cat.

Course, I could just move him. But he looks so comfy!

*sigh*... unfortunately, my cats are completely aware of who runs this household, and let me tell you, it's not on two legs.

I think our dishwasher is broken, but I'm not sure because I've never actually run it myself before. I could just be inept. Either way, the dishes are currently not getting clean. My paper that is due tomorrow is about 1/2 done. I am going to go drink water and try to make my hands less itchy and puffy.

OH. 20.1" LCD monitor of shininess. +5 to viewing and all headache checks. Gentoo is currently a *tiny* bit broken, because Andrew is fixing things. I can't actually log in right now. Or do... anything. But when things are done getting fixed, it should solve a lot of problems I've been having. Yay!

I really should not stay up past 11 when I'm by myself. Emo-tasticness ensues.

I want to fix things with people. There are at least four distinct situations with different people that vary from mildly to exceedingly unpleasant, and each one makes me feel a little more like a terrible person. I don't like having things hanging unresolved. I know a lot of people, and I have a tendency to make friends with people who don't open up very easily. It's almost like I refuse to accept their refusal to accept true friendships. Only now I'm starting to wonder if friendship with me is any better than none. I always mean well, but somehow I always end up hurting people anyway.

Bah. I guess I just have to pay more attention, try harder, whatever it takes.

First I should go to bed though.

Tasty.

Brooke — Mon, 19 Feb 2007 23:33:00 +0000

Cream of Wheat is one of my favorite breakfasts ever. Probably partly because it reminds me of my mommy, but also because it tastes darn good with a little butter and salt, or a little butter and sugar, or a little butter and brown sugar, or just butter, or just sugar, or without anything.... I just like it.

I am less than impressed with the new blogger, after all the frustrations I went through to get it. Now it's on the wrong google account too, and in order to log in I automatically log out of all my other google services. Also, support for my issues was non-existant even after submitting three tickets.

I have a paper, a pre-lab, a post-lab, and several days worth of circuits problems to do before tomorrow. I am rather frustrated with myself for not being able to finish it earlier (I did try, a lot), so I'm going to sit and listen to depressing music and work on the paper for a while.

I hate writing so much.

Moogle.

Brooke — Fri, 16 Feb 2007 09:12:00 +0000

I am doing awesomely. Except that the speech I was supposed to turn in wednesday is not turned in. It might be turned in tomorrow... if I get around to writing it.

I'm tired, and sleepy (two very different things, but in this case I am both). This would be cool, except that the aforementioned speech still isn't written.

I like people. My roommate sees me maybe once a month these days. I feel kind of bad about that. Food is good to have.

The End.

Woot.

Brooke — Fri, 09 Feb 2007 20:37:00 +0000

I got my moneys. Only a month after the quarter began. Yay, now I can buy food.

.

Brooke — Tue, 06 Feb 2007 23:22:00 +0000

That is the sound of the weekend flying by. Did you hear anything? That's just how fast it was. And how gone.

Actually monday and tuesday are pretty gone too, at this point. Test and speech tomorrow. The test in speech today went fine, it was ridiculously boring and entirely based off of random buzzwords that the book likes to use.

The weekend was really really fun (sharon, cameron, andrew and I went to housesit at andrew's parents' house in anacortes, and played games all weekend), but both sharon and I have some catching up to do now. Oh well, there's not much we can do about it now other than fix it.

I've forgotten how to play with the internet.

Brooke — Fri, 02 Feb 2007 06:43:00 +0000

Tonight is the first night since the beginning of the quarter that I haven't been staying up late to finish homework. I got on the internet and realized that I didn't know where to start. It's been a very long time since I spent hours just browsing the internet, and I don't even remember what I *did* with all that time. Or the things I do remember, I can't remember how it managed to occupy my attention for so long.

I guess this is a good thing? My schoolwork is getting done, except when there is quite literally just too much to do in one night. So far this has only actually happened once.

This weekend I might even have some free time! I'm excited.

Very few people read this anymore. Perhaps it's just that the people I never see just don't think about it anymore, and the people I see all the time talk to me "in real life."

Someday I will retire this blog and post it somewhere hidden in a corner where people who know about it can look at it for nostalgia's sake. But that probably won't happen until I have something actually useful to do with this site.

harr.

New Phone!!!!

Brooke — Thu, 01 Feb 2007 18:47:00 +0000

I got a new phone. I got it for -$25 on amazon.com, so I have a new number. If you want it, call my old phone and listen to the voicemail message... or e-mail me or IM me or something.

It's also an mp3 player. And it has bluetooth. It's no iPhone, but it's shiny. It's a samsung D807, if you care to look it up and see how shiny it is.

Shiny.

Oh, also, I'm suffering from homework-induced tuberculosis or something. I have homework for my homework. I have homework for my homework's homework. Hopefully it will stop being so insane about a month before the quarter ends (since I will have finished everything I need to do for speech), but right now it's pretty hellish.

And my roommate sees me about once a week, for five minutes. :(

Stupid mailbox. pout

Brooke — Thu, 25 Jan 2007 01:31:00 +0000

My check from finaid has still not arrived. I asked about it Friday. They said it was put in the mail Thursday and should actually go out from western either Friday or Monday. Also, I just realized that there's a slight possibility that it was mailed to my permanent address instead of my current address (remote, but annoying possibility).

It is bothersome.